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Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Sam Bradford trade was right move, so shut up

Second-guessing the Sam Bradford trade has become a thing lately.

The argument goes that the Vikings should not have sacrificed a first-round pick to get Bradford because Bradford ended up not being the Vikings' offensive savior.

Hindsight is 20/20!

Fact is, the Vikings after Teddy Bridgewater's injury had no choice but to mortgage their future in order to bring in Bradford.

You don't get that many chances to make a run and the Vikings believed - and most pundits agreed with this assessment if you remember - that this was their year.

They believed they had the O-line thing figured out. They believed they had the defense. They believed they had the offensive weapons in place.

For various reasons, some of the above beliefs turned out to be false. Maybe they should not have been so confident about their O-line, but the point is, they thought what they thought and made the trade accordingly.

Their rationale was sound, proceeding from the assumptions they were obviously making (and many fans were making the same assumptions if you remember).

Has it worked out exactly the way the Vikings hoped? No.

Would it be nice to have back that first-round pick? Yeah.

But Rick Spielman did what he had to do. Now he has to figure out some way to rebuild the offensive line without possessing a first-round pick in 2017.

If Rick is really as great a GM as some people think, he'll figure something out.

If not...the Vikings will get a new GM.

If Spielman does end up being fired, there will be a long list of moves and non-moves to dissect as part of the post-mortem.

The Bradford trade will not be listed among Spielman's worst decisions.

Laquon Treadwell is not like Bernard Berrian...

Bernard Berrian could RUN.

Monday, November 28, 2016

I hope Laquon Treadwell is more than just talk

Laquon Treadwell hasn't done jack shit for the Vikings on the field this year.

But he still has his confidence if his quote in the St. Paul Pioneer-Press is any indication:

[Sam] Bradford, the Minnesota quarterback, said after that game the Vikings need more big plays and on Sunday he called for more shots downfield. Could Treadwell help in that regard?

“Absolutely, of course,’’ Treadwell said. “I can make plays, give them more in the rhythm with the offense. I’ll make plays.’’

HE IS A PART OF THE RHYTHM NATION.

But seriously, here's what I want Laquon Treadwell to do:

First I want him to shut the fuck up about what he's gonna do.

Then I want him to go out and do something.

Anything.

Sorry but I'm past the point now where I'm willing to give Treadwell a total pass JUST cause he's a rookie.

I'm not saying he should be putting up monster numbers. But he should at least be contributing by now.

Treadwell can't control everything that happens on the field. It's not all his fault that he hasn't done anything as of yet.

You know what he can control? The bullshit that comes out of his mouth.

Adam Thielen didn't have to tell people what he was gonna do. He just worked and got better and now he's a legit #2 wide receiver.

Treadwell, at least by virtue of his draft position, is supposed to have a lot more ability than Adam Thielen. If he wants that ability to translate into production? He needs to work his ass off.

And needs to walk the walk, not just talk the talk.

Sharrif Floyd should not figure into Vikings' future plans

It was cool for a minute to believe Sharrif Floyd could develop into the next Kevin Williams, but it's become painfully apparent that this dream will never come true.

Injuries have totally derailed Floyd's career and I don't see it getting back on track in the near future if ever.

Floyd has indeed shown flashes of dominance when he's been able to stay healthy. Flashes of the player many thought he could become when the Vikings took him in the first round out of Florida.

WHEN HE'S BEEN ABLE TO STAY HEALTHY.

This year, he hasn't been anywhere near healthy. He hasn't been in the same TIME ZONE as healthy.

Floyd has played in only one game this year thanks to ongoing knee problems, knee problems that a few weeks ago led to arthorscopic surgery, and is unlikely to play Thursday when the Vikings host the Cowboys.

Without Floyd, the Vikings' defensive line has been good but inconsistent. What would that D-line look like with Floyd in there, playing up to his potential and above all STAYING HEALTHY.

We will never find out, because Floyd will never stay healthy.

The 2016 season looks like a lost one for Sharrif Floyd (and looks increasingly like a lost one for the Vikings as a whole).

The Vikings picked up Floyd's fifth-year option but are under no obligation to keep him in 2017. If they do keep him, they will have to pay him $6.75 million for one year.

$6.75 million for a 3-tech who can't stay on the field? No fucking thanks.

Time to write Sharrif Floyd out of the script and pursue a 3-tech who stays on the field and contributes.

Friday, November 25, 2016

The public doesn't have opinions, only moods



From On Revolution by Hannah Arendt:

Opinions are formed in a process of open discussion and public debate, and where no opportunity for the forming of opinions exists, there may be moods - moods of the masses and moods of individuals, the latter no less fickle and unreliable than the former - but no opinion.

Adrian Peterson should just stay away

Adrian Peterson is hoping to return to the field for the Vikings in mid-December. This according to a report from ESPN.

Why is AD pushing himself to return so quickly? Ben Goessling suggests that Peterson is motivated to get back this year because the Super Bowl is in Houston and he'd love to win a championship in his home state of Texas.

My somewhat more cynical take: Peterson knows the Vikings may cut him to save money and if he does get cut he wants to be in position to negotiate a lucrative new contract somewhere.

If he comes back and runs well, teams will feel safer throwing money at him.

Viking fans look at Peterson as a potential savior. Would Peterson give the offense the boost necessary to propel Minnesota to the playoffs?

The odds are against it.

It would likely take Peterson a couple of weeks to work himself back into full game-shape. The clock would likely run out on the Vikings' season before Peterson had a chance to really get back to form.

There's also the problem of working him into an offense that under Pat Shurmur has evolved somewhat away from the scheme Norv Turner was trying to run.

Peterson never looked in sync with the Vikings' shotgun looks. But with Sam Bradford in there and the offensive line struggling in pass protection, the Vikes have become largely a shotgun, get-the-ball-out-as-fast-as-possible offense.

Are the Vikings going to scrap - or at least dial back - the shotgun just to accommodate Peterson? Are they going to bring back Norv's deep drops and play-action?

The blocking isn't suddenly going to improve just because Peterson is back.

If lack of running back talent were the Vikings' ONLY problem, I would feel much more confident about Peterson returning and kick-starting the offense.

But the offense has a lot of other problems too. And Peterson's return might in some ways actually cause that unit to regress.

Had Peterson not gotten hurt, I have no doubt the Vikings' offense would be better than it is. And it's likely Norv Turner would still be the OC.

But the continuity has been broken and the scheme has been shifted. Mixing Peterson into the new, evolving offense might do more harm than good.

Peterson would love to prove that he can make this comeback, pick the team up and carry it into the playoffs.

But it's more likely that, in typical Peterson fashion, he would fumble away his chance at redemption.

Peterson should focus on next year. He's no savior.

Thursday, November 24, 2016

The Vikings can still make a playoff run but probably won't

The Vikings are not technically out of it at 6-5. Technically, they could still make a run, finish 10-6 and if not win the division - a very distant prospect after today's loss to Detroit - then snag a Wild Card.

But let's be real: that's not going to happen. THIS team with THIS offense is not putting together enough wins to make the postseason.

Things looked pretty dismal Thursday. Sam Bradford was limited to dink-and-dunk passes all day thanks to the O-line. Without Stefon Diggs on the field the Vikings were unable to get any big plays.

Things got even worse when both Joe Berger and Jeremiah Sirles went out with injury. Willie Fucking Beavers was playing right tackle by the end of the game.

The defense played okay most of the game but had some breakdowns late and let Detroit tie it. And then Sam Bradford threw a terrible pick trying to a force a ball into Adam Thielen - the only receiver Bradford apparently trusts outside of Diggs - and Detroit turned that into the game-winning field goal.

The team that slogged through Thursday's loss is not a playoff team. It's maybe 8-8. Next week's game vs. Dallas could be a slaughter.

To me, 2016 is already a lost season. The Vikings need to do some major soul-searching in the offseason. And they need to find people who can block and run the ball. They need to seriously upgrade their O-line and their running back corps. And find another safety because Andrew Sendejo...pew.

Thanksgiving can blow me

I wish I could think of something pithy to say about Thanksgiving.

I wish I could concoct some devastatingly witty Thanksgiving take-down.

I wish I could gather my thoughts about Thanksgiving and express them in a form that would fully convey my disdain for the entire notion of the holiday.

But this morning I would rather jab myself in the eyes with sharpened sticks than write. Or think. Or feel.

So this is all I got:

Thanksgiving can blow me.

Enjoy your turkey, turkeys!


Wednesday, November 23, 2016

The one unforgivable thing Rick Spielman did this year...

There are a LOT of things you can rip Rick Spielman on this year. But so what, right? ALL GMs make bad moves. And good moves. Overall Spielman has been a good GM for the Vikes. More good moves than bad. Right?

For me though there is one thing Spielman did this year that is hard to just shrug off:

Going into the draft, the Vikings had made all the significant moves they were going to make to shore up their offensive line.

They had already picked up Alex Boone and Andre Smith. They had already settled on Matt Kalil as the starting left tackle. They probably already knew that they wouldn't be holding on to John Sullivan. They had already settled on Brandon Fusco as their right guard.

And of course they had already replaced Jeff Davidson with Tony Sparano.

They had already addressed their issues on the offensive line. As far as fans were concerned. And apparently, as far as Rick Spielman was concerned.

So when the draft came along, Spielman was convinced that the Vikings DIDN'T need to spend a high pick on an offensive lineman.

Spielman believed the team already had enough depth on the line. How convinced was Spielman of this "fact?"

He went receiver/cornerback in the first two rounds then spent a fourth-rounder on a lineman everyone believed was a project.

Think about that though: Spielman was SO SURE the line was sufficiently shored-up, he felt comfortable using a pick on a guy he KNEW would not be able to contribute this year.

Not only did fans buy into the idea that the Vikings' O-line was fixed, Spielman did too.

He bought into it so thoroughly that he didn't cover himself by picking up extra insurance in the draft.

At the very least, Spielman could have made some trades and gotten back into the third and taken a lineman who was closer to being ready than Willie Beavers.

It bugs me that Spielman didn't at least see the need for more insurance. He actually thought the Vikings had made enough moves.

It's true that Spielman could not have anticipated the rash of injuries that hit the offensive line. But you don't pick up insurance because you KNOW things are going to go wrong.

It's called insurance for a reason.

The Vikings had a chance to beef up their offensive line depth in the draft and didn't do it. They figured they had enough.

They didn't have enough.

I should hope that next year Spielman will finally realize he needs to spend some of his precious draft picks on linemen.  And not sixth rounders either.

No more waiting for the fourth and taking a guy who is one-to-two years away from even being viable as a backup.

Spielman fucked up, pure and simple.

Fuck Golden Tate

Tomorrow the Vikings play the Lions with first-place in the NFC North on the line but frankly screw all that division lead crap. I honestly don't even care that much if the Vikings win the game. It's not like Minnesota is going to go make a Super Bowl run this year. If they miss the playoffs? So what. Let the Lions win the game and take command of the division. I don't care. I just want to see Golden Tate get fucked the fuck up. Legal hit or illegal hit. I want someone to take that cocksucker's head off. You know what I truly wish? That the Vikings could get Percy Harvin for one game, make him a DB and tell him to blow Tate the fuck up. Order Percy to break Tate's spine. Too bad Percy is on the Bills (if he hasn't retired again by now; I lose track). That's okay, Harrison Smith can get the job done. You know it's at least in the back of the players' minds to give Tate SOMETHING for that asinine leap when he scored the winning touchdown in the last game. You KNOW Andy Sendejo would LOVE to pulverize Tate. Sendejo loves pulverizing people, especially his own teammates. For once it would be nice if Sendejo could focus his destructive energies on an opposing player. I don't care who does it, I just want to see Golden Tate laid out. I want to see him broken in half. I want them to have to take his dismembered body parts off the field in several garbage bags. I want GUTS spilled. I want EYEBALLS POPPED OUT like in Any Given Sunday. I want carnage. I want Golden Taint to fucking die on the turf. I'm serious. KILL that piece of fucking shit.

Scientology going soft?

Why isn't Leah Remini face down in a river right now? When did Scientology turn into an organization of pussies? Was a time when Miscavige and his thugs would have DISAPPEARED this woman. Not anymore. Now they let people run around talking ALL KINDS OF SHIT, threatening lawsuits, exposing the dark secrets of the church. L. Ron Hubbard is on his eternal Scientology planet (or whatever those dumb assholes believe in) somewhere vomiting bile over this. He founded this AMAZING LOAD OF BULLSHIT, this stupendously devious machine for blackmailing closeted homosexual idiots, and these people are going to let Leah Remini bring it down? Leah fucking Remini??? It's like the Catholic church in De Medici times folded the tent because some half-retard nun fled the convent and started screaming about the pope being a baby-fucker. CRUCIFY this woman Scientologists. Slap her in an iron maiden. Send Tom Cruise to go JACK REACHER on her ass. Man up, Hubbard-fuckers.

Justin Bieber is punk rock

Bieber punching his Spanish fan in the face is the most punk rock move I've seen from a pop star in forever. Knowing that there's still SOMEONE out there willing to uphold the punk rock ethos, willing to take the flag from Johnny Rotten, Henry Rollins, Iggy Pop and the like, it just warms the cockles of my heart. Next time somebody tries to get handsy with you Bieber? Jump out of the car, grab that fucker and give him the business. You seen Bieber lately? Dude is RIPPED. Barcelona no-respect-for-personal-space guy is lucky he only ended up with a bloody lip. Bieber could have UTTERLY DESTROYED HIM. Punk rock lives kids, and it lives in Justin Bieber. Don't let his pussy-ass music fool you. Dude is the reincarnation of Joe Strummer. Now if we could just get Bieber interested in politics and shit. We need to RADICALIZE Bieber. We need to WEAPONIZE Bieber. Somebody introduce this kid to MIA.

Monday, November 21, 2016

Vikings fall on right side of fine line for once

The Vikings on Sunday found a winning formula:

ONE 100-yard interception return TD from Xavier Rhodes.

ONE 104-yard kick return TD from Cordarrelle Patterson.

No turnovers until a late fumble by Sam Bradford.

A high-accuracy, low-risk passing day from Bradford. 71% completion rate but only 6.04 yards-per-attempt, Bradford's second-lowest yards-per-attempt average on the season.

Success in short-yardage situations, including a 2-yard TD run by Matt Asiata.

ENOUGH production from receivers not named Stefon Diggs.

A good pass rush and fewer blown plays on the back end.

It worked for one day against a mediocre Cardinals team.

But is success sustainable via this formula?

Only if you think the Vikings' defense and special teams can continue coming up with big plays.

It's a fine line the Vikings walk. On Sunday they landed on the right side of that fine line.

It's REALLY easy to land on the wrong side of that fine line, as we saw during the losing streak.

If the Vikes want to build on yesterday, they must find big plays from their offense.

That means - deep breath Dan - getting Cordarrelle Patterson more involved.

As for the running game...look back at the winning formula above and note that the running backs are not mentioned except for Asiata's touchdown.

Jerick McKinnon's 44-yards-on-16-rushes day was NOT impressive.

McKinnon also had only one reception for negative-three yards.

LEGIT WEAPON.

If the Vikings need to keep following yesterday's formula, they'll close out 2-4 and miss the playoffs.

Sunday, November 20, 2016

Vikings fans need to reframe

You're stressed out by the Vikings' four-game losing streak. Don't worry, I can help you deal with that.

Before you go reaching for the bottle, try a little reframing.

Instead of thinking of the streak as a horrible, on-going, slow-motion catastrophe, think of it as the prelude to an eventual resurgence.

Think of it as the reload before the final glorious volley!

Don't think that the defense has regressed or that Mike Zimmer's scheme has been "figured out" by offensive coordinators.

Instead look at the defense's struggles as a necessary "learning experience." Zimmer hasn't been figured out, he's just being challenged.

Being challenged is how geniuses become even greater geniuses!

Losing helps a team overcome complacency, stagnation, lethargy.

Don't look at the lack of a running game as something alarming and unfixable. Instead, remind yourself that the team has changed offensive coordinators and shuffled the offensive line and is naturally going to need a period of adjustment.

Tell yourself that Jerick McKinnon has the talent to be a legit weapon!

Don't get too crazy when the Vikings struggle to push the ball downfield. They have downfield weapons and a QB who has more than enough arm to hit deep passes! They just need to incorporate more of those looks as they go along!

And when the offensive line starts looking like a leaky dam and Sam Bradford is getting destroyed and running backs are getting corralled in the backfield and there is NOTHING going on downfield because there isn't time for those plays to develop?

That one's easy: "The O-line just needs to stay healthy and get a chance to gel."

With just a little reframing, you can start to have a good feeling about the Vikings' future! Try it!

Friday, November 18, 2016

Stefon Diggs will get shut down by Patrick Peterson

Patrick Peterson will be shadowing Stefon Diggs all day for Arizona, says Cardinals coach Bruce Arians.

A very sound strategy indeed!

Diggs has been great this year but I think he's going to have a tough day against Peterson.

Last year Peterson totally shut Diggs down. With all due respect to Diggs, I expect a repeat of last year's game.

With Diggs getting taken out of the game by Peterson, other Vikings receivers are going to have to step up big time.

Cordarrelle Patterson could be huge this week for Minnesota. I NEVER thought I'd type those words.

I have to give it up to Patterson, he's proven that he can be a viable receiver for the Vikings.

One of these weeks Patterson is going to bust out. OH MY GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT.

Adam Thielen will also be important for the Vikes this week. It would be nice to see Charles Johnson get involved as well but...well, I ain't holding my breath.

Maybe Laquon Treadwell will even be active for this game and get a chance to make an impact.

We can hope!

All this is probably moot though, since the Vikings can't mount any kind of running game in support of their more-than-adequate passing game.

FUCK I wish the Vikings had drafted Derrick Henry.


Nature is not a Disney movie


Awwwww, so CUTE.

Or maybe NOT so cute (via Gizmodo):

Remember that heartwarming video from a few days ago showing a dog as it was being petted by a giant polar bear? In a twist that comes as a surprise to no one, a polar bear had to be immobilized last week after it killed and ate a dog from the same sled pack. 
Brian Ladoon, who runs the 5 Dog Sanctuary in Churchill, Manitoba, told CBC News that he spotted nine bears near the area where he keeps his dogs chained up, and that one of these bears killed and ate one of his dogs. “That was the only day we didn’t feed the fucking bears, the only night we didn’t put anything out,” he exclaimed.
As Timothy Treadwell once found out the hard hard hard way, nature is not a Disney movie.

Nature is hard and cruel and awful.

Nature is dog-eat-dog. Or sometimes polar-bear-eat-dog.

So remember, the next time you see a heartwarming video of a polar bear petting a dog, don't be fooled.

That polar bear ain't trying to be friends with the dog. He's sizing up the dog. He's figuring out if the dog could possibly be food.

And if a polar bear ever starts adorably sniffing around you? He ain't looking for a new human companion.

He's deciding if he can take you. And he definitely can take you. He will eat every part of your body and shit you out.

Wild animals: Not our friends.

Kanye West has a good reason to support Trump

Kanye West upset a bunch of people by saying in concert he would have voted for Trump.

Kanye's reasoning? No clue.

We can easily imagine Kanye's motives for supporting Trump though.

It goes like this:

Kanye is rich. Trump is the candidate of rich people.

Kanye identifies with the guy who is dazzled by gold, who bones models, who is purely ego-driven.

Kanye basically IS Trump. If Trump had real talent.

So, there's no reason to be surprised. Outside of the racial thing, Kanye and Trump have soooo much in common.

Kanye is just sticking up for one of his own.

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Blair Walsh never had it so good

Where will Blair Walsh land?

What will happen when Walsh lands wherever he lands?

I understand if some Vikings fans answer: Who cares?

I want to move on from Walsh too, but I wish to make one last point before that happens: Blair Walsh doesn't appreciate how easy he had it in Minnesota.

Walsh may feel he was treated unfairly by media and fans. But he wasn't.

Walsh was treated VERY well by Minnesota fans. Lots of fanbases would have absolutely obliterated Walsh after the Seattle miss.

Imagine how Philly fans would have reacted. Or Chicago fans. Or New York fans.

Sure, Walsh got shit from some Vikings fans. But nowhere near as much shit as he would have gotten in a lot of other places.

Vikings fans are some of the most forgiving in all the NFL. The fanbase at large had more-or-less let Walsh off the hook within a few weeks of the Seattle game.

And if Vikings fans are pussy cats, the media members covering the Vikings are outright wimps.

The Twin Cities media contingent is one of the softest and least-confrontational in the country. It was hilarious when Blair Walsh lashed out at those wussies.

Walsh behaved like a guy who was beset on all sides by frothing, blood-thirsty jackals. They're not jackals, they're puppy dogs.

Where will Walsh end up? For his sake, I hope he doesn't land in a city where the media really go after you.

He better not end up in New York or New England or Philly. Or he will be toast.

Blair Walsh may not realize it today but he had it EASY in Minnesota. He was babied in Minnesota.

He won't be babied like that anywhere else.






Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Blair Walsh got cut cause he didn't do his job

Blair Walsh got cut, not because he is the worst kicker in the world, but because for whatever reason he was not able to do his job.

He did not get cut because he mouthed off to the media.

He did not get cut because he was a bad guy. Or because his teammates didn't like him.

Who could hate adorable Blair Walsh???

Walsh is not gone because he missed a kick in the playoffs or even because he missed some field goal kicks this year.

Kicking long field goals under pressure is HARD. Even good kickers often miss those.

No, Walsh is not gone because he failed at the hard part of his job. He is gone because he failed at the EASIEST part (except non-onside kick-offs).

33-yard extra points are harder than the old shorter extra points, but they're still almost the very easiest part of being a kicker.

There is ZERO pressure on a kicker trying to make an extra point at the end of the half to put the team up by 7 points.

In Washington in perfectly fine weather conditions!

Last week Mike Zimmer weakly defended Blair Walsh with this line of bullshit:

"When the three-technique (defensive tackle) messes up, no one sees it,” Zimmer said. “When the kicker messes up, everyone sees it. That’s the big thing. The guy’s missed three extra points. I can probably get 10 guys that screwed up three points this year. … We all make mistakes. I think (Walsh is) a very talented guy.”
If the 3-tech messes up enough, people WILL notice. And if he messes up at the relatively easy parts of his job more than he should, HE WILL GET BENCHED OR CUT.

Shut up Zimmer. Just, shut up.

No, Blair Walsh is not gone because he fucked the Vikings and their fans on a freezing-ass day in January against Seattle.

He's gone because his confidence was shot. So shot he couldn't even consistently make what should be, for a guy like him, a practically automatic kick.

The Vikings cut his ass even though they have to eat $3 million in dead money. They don't even get any cap relief by cutting this guy!

Kai Forbath will be the Vikings' kicker now. Kai Forbath is not the greatest kicker ever. He's not even as good a kicker, all things being equal, as Blair Walsh.

But you know what Forbath does? He makes extra points. Almost all the time. Last year, Forbath was 34-for-35 in extra points.

Forbath probably ain't gonna stick 55-yard field goals. But he also ain't gonna screw you by turning sevens into sixes.

Walsh just needed to make a couple more easy ones and he'd still have his job. Sayonara.


Monday, November 14, 2016

Vikings lack of running game is massive unfixable problem

2.2 yards-per-carry. That was the Vikings' average Sunday against the Redskins. On the season, they are averaging a 2.7 yards-per-carry. In case you're wondering, that is not very good!

Who is to blame for this disaster? The first culprit to look at is the offensive line. Clearly the blocking has been across-the-board abysmal, but it's too simplistic to ONLY blame the injury-ridden line for the Vikings' issues. Look at the guys taking the hand-offs for the Vikings. Matt Asiata? Gritty competitor but not even close to starting caliber. Jerick McKinnon? Loads of physical talent but questionable vision. And even if he maxes out, I think he's at best an okay third-down back. Ronnie Hillman? Stopgap.

Bottom line, the Vikings will NEVER get it done with the array of running backs they currently feature. When Adrian Peterson went down they lost their running game. WHY didn't the Vikings address the running back position in the draft? Why didn't they pick up another talented back to give them some insurance against a possible Peterson injury/age-related dip in production? Ask Rick Spielman.

Most of us, I think, were somewhat surprised when the Vikings didn't draft a running back. A lot of us advocated Asiata being let go so they could add someone who brings a little more to the table. They didn't draft a back, they didn't go after anyone in free agency. The put their eggs in the Asiata/McKinnon basket. It was a terrible idea.

What do they do now? Hope the offensive line picks up the blocking? Hope McKinnon starts to get it? Hope their passing game begins to force defenses into different looks that allow for more running room?

Hope. Wish. Pray. That's all we can do. The Vikes don't have any answers on their roster. They're a one-dimensional team. One-dimensional teams don't win. This team can't win.

Sunday, November 13, 2016

Vikings still suck, lose to Redskins

I watched the whole first half and none of the second half. In the first half, the Vikings' defense played like horseshit and let Washington get up 14-0. As usual the Vikings could not run the ball. Then Pat Shurmur made some kind of wizard-like adjustment and the Vikings' offense erupted. By which I mean, the Redskins kept letting Stefon Diggs get open and Sam Bradford kept feeding him the ball. Washington's defense was so bad it didn't even matter that the Vikings STILL couldn't run the ball. It helped that the Vikings stopped committing dumb penalties and actually pass-protected a little bit. The Vikings scored three unanswered touchdowns and two of them were followed by ACTUAL made extra points. At the very end of the half the Vikings got the ball after a fumble and scored and Blair Walsh missed wide left. That sequence also featured another case of Mike Zimmer forgetting that he was supposed to call a time out. The Vikings were up 20-14 and looking good!

Then the second half happened and I don't know what the fuck went wrong. The Vikings couldn't score anymore, and Washington made a bunch of field goals, and the Vikings fell behind 26-20. On the last sequence with the Vikings trying to drive to score a touchdown, Sam Bradford took a bad sack and Jake Long got hurt and EVERYTHING WENT ENTIRELY TO SHIT. The Vikings lost. So now they're 5-4 and basically, the Lions are going to win the division.

Irritating loss but at least the Vikings are figuring things out offensively I think. Now if they could just get some god damn running game going. Jerick McKinnon, SUCK LESS. You are supposed to be the talented one who becomes a "legit weapon" this year. I said a hundred times last year you were going to become a "legit weapon." So become one! Stop dancing around in the backfield. Attack the hole, young man. Come on now McKinnon. All we have besides you is Matt Asiata and Ronnie Hillman. RONNIE HILLMAN.

Friday, November 11, 2016

Being mad won't help Blair Walsh

Pardon me Mike Priefer but this is bullshit. (via St. Paul Pioneer-Press)

When struggling Vikings kicker Blair Walsh was told a half-dozen candidates would be brought in to compete for his job, he got irritated.

Special-teams coordinator Mike Priefer considered that a good thing.

The Vikings brought six kickers to Winter Park on Tuesday to audition. In the end, the team decided not to replace Walsh — for now — despite his missed extra point, blocked field-goal attempt and botched kickoff in last Sunday’s 22-16 overtime loss to Detroit.

“I knew how he would react because I’ve known him now for five-plus years,” Priefer said Thursday. “It kind of lit a fire under him. (Walsh) got ticked off in a good way, I think, because he’s a competitive young man. … If he didn’t react that way, I would be really worried and then we probably would be looking for another guy. … If he’s going to feel sorry for himself, then he’s not the guy we want.”

Blair Walsh gets defensive with reporters. Blair Walsh gets "ticked off" by the Vikings' farcical dog-and-pony-show kicker try out.

Proof that Blair Walsh is a tough cookie?

Horseshit. Blair Walsh is brittle.

Blair Walsh's brittleness is the reason he keeps missing kicks.

Ticked off Blair Walsh won't be a good kicker.

Stop making excuses for Blair Walsh, Mike Zimmer:

"When the three-technique (defensive tackle) messes up, no one sees it,” Zimmer said. “When the kicker messes up, everyone sees it. That’s the big thing. The guy’s missed three extra points. I can probably get 10 guys that screwed up three points this year. … We all make mistakes. I think (Walsh is) a very talented guy.”

You know who sees it when the 3-tech messes up? Pro Football Focus.

"When the kicker messes up, everyone sees it."

Exactly. And some kickers have the mental fortitude to survive that scrutiny.

Blair Walsh does not have that mental fortitude.

Who cares if Blair Walsh is mad? I get mad every time he misses a kick. I'm sick of being mad. I'd rather be happy.

Tuesday, November 8, 2016

I'm sick of Blair Walsh

Enough already. It's time for Blair Walsh to go.

This is not personal. Just as it was not personal when I (ha ha ha) helped run Christian Ponder out of town.

It's strictly business.

The Vikings' business is winning, and Blair Walsh hinders their ability to take care of their business.

Is Blair Walsh the team's worst problem? No.

No one is suggesting that getting rid of Walsh will magically fix the Vikings.

Nothing will magically fix the Vikings.

I'm not even sure the Vikings are all that broken. Losing three games in a row is bad but they're still 5-3 and I actually think Pat Shurmur can get the offense to a place where it at least functions.

BTW, the defense didn't go from dominating to shit in the course of three games. Mike Zimmer didn't go from being a great coach to garbage in three games.

Was the Lions game disappointing? Yes. Did the defense shit the bed? Yes. Did Zimmer fuck up game management? Definitely.

But those issues can be straightened out and I have faith in Zimmer's ability to make the necessary changes.

Guess what guys? Even good teams sometimes have bad three-game stretches.

Yes the Vikes have things they need to work on, but their problems are largely fixable.

Shurmur can coach up the offense, Zimmer can coach up the defense.

Tell me though: What can anyone do for Blair Walsh?

Mike Priefer isn't some brilliant psychologist. He ain't gonna sit Blair Walsh down and get to the root of his problems and teach him techniques to help him get over his obvious issues.

Walsh is just not in the right place mentally right now. His performance shows that. His post-game semi-meltdown drove home the point.

The Vikings are right to work out kickers. And not just to send a message.

I'm sure Mike Zimmer is sick of having to answer questions about Walsh. He's even sicker of watching Walsh's kicks miss the mark.

We're all sick of watching Walsh's kicks miss the mark. We're increasingly sick of his defensive, whining-bitch attitude.

Sorry Blair, but you are losing support among the fans. After the Seattle game people were willing to stick up for you.

Now? Who is willing to stick up for Walsh?

It's not personal. I have nothing against Blair Walsh.

I had nothing against Christian Ponder. I and most fans simply saw that he could not get the job done. That he was not mentally strong enough to endure the rigors of the NFL.

Blair Walsh is simply not mentally strong enough. People who still want to make excuses for him? I'm sick of them.

But I'm even sicker of Walsh. Get him the fuck out.

Wednesday, November 2, 2016

Mike Zimmer and Norv Turner had "different views" about offense?

Why did Norv Turner resign his position as Vikings offensive coordinator? Via ESPN:

After Turner surprised Zimmer on Wednesday morning with his resignation, Turner told ESPN's Ed Werder, "I think it's just we have different views on where the offense was going."

Lucky the Vikings just happened to have Pat Shurmur lying around. I mean what a great break that was!

If you think the Vikings had no idea Norv might pull the plug on himself...well, you might be naive.

OF COURSE Turner was forced out. You think Zim wants to go down tied to a dinosaur of an offensive coordinator?

Pat Shurmur may not be the answer either but if you have him in place you have to try.

Enjoy the racetrack Norv!

Norv Turner thoughts

Norv Turner is out as Vikings offensive coordinator and probably nothing will be fixed. Probably the offense will go on being utterly inept, unable to run the ball, unable to protect Sam Bradford, unable to in any way complement the team's defense (which looked over-stressed Monday night against Chicago). Pat Shurmur is by all accounts a solid offensive coordinator but he is up against the same shit as Turner: broken offensive line, no running back, quarterback who is trying to learn the offense on the fly. Is the 51-year-old Shurmur better-equipped to fashion a viable offense out of this mess than the 64-year-old Turner? Shurmur rightly or wrongly is perceived as a coordinator who is more in tune with modern-day offensive trends. Shurmur worked with West Coast maven Andy Reid in Philadelphia then spent time with Chip Kelly, soaking up the finer points of Kelly's up-tempo offense. Turner on the other hand is perceived as a dinosaur who only knows one way: run the ball and go play-action. Turner probably is a little more flexible than people wish to give him credit for. Did he not manage to make it work with Jerick McKinnon and Matt Asiata after Adrian Peterson was suspended for most of a season? Did he not try to implement a more Teddy Bridgewater-friendly offense even with Adrian Peterson in the fold, leading to much unhappiness on Peterson's part? Likewise, Shurmur is probably not as innovative as some want to believe. As usual, there are dynamics going on here that we can't possibly know anything about. What frustrations might Norv Turner have been dealing with behind-the-scenes? How was Norv's approach meshing with what Shurmur and O-line maven Tony Sparano bring to the table? Was it just a case of too many cooks? Now there's one less cook in the kitchen, and the remaining chefs will have to whip up something fast, otherwise the Vikings' season will have to be scraped off the plate into the garbage. I doubt we'll see any dramatic improvement from the offense this weekend. You're still going to war with the worst offensive line in the league, no running back and a QB who looks increasingly rattled.